So I am reading my botany texbook and finding lots of odd funny unrelated things – they make sense, but they are completely ridicuouls. So there we go, quotes for you guys to smile at.
"If you stick a pin into a pillow, you cretainly don't expect any reaction from the pillow, but if you stick the same pin into a friend, you know your friend will react immediately."
"Guppies never have puppies – just more guppies."
Middle of the week. I am in a miserable allergic state of mind – and body. Runny nose affects my brain, and the latter one refuses to think and tries to command my body to attempt to conjure a blanket from air so that I could hide in it from the world and then disappear with the blanket like those wizards do in their robe – and appear somewhere on a little quiet island without allergens or classes anywhere in sight.
And of course you end up going hiking for your lab, which makes you more tired and increases your allergies, and kicks your brain out to the point where you don't remember what those plants are called. And then, just when you think the fun is over – you get handed a rose made of condoms by some random representative of healthcare services, which makes it all awkward to walk down the hallway because you inevitably feel like everybody is staring at you even if they don't.
And then you want to take a nap, but you don't wanna bother – so you lay down on your bed without taking off your boots, and start typing random stuff – when suddenly your phone scares the crap outta you because you set a rattlesnake ringtone for your facebook alerts.
And the day isn't even half over…
Well, the first day of class is over. I am sitting in my pajamas eating delicious ramen noodles in the dark scared that I'll spill it all over my keyboard.
Today was crappy. I woke up ways before my class started – feeling the annoying allergies in my throat and the horrible cold in my bedroom. Hot shower and hot tea fixed it somewhat, but I was really not enthusiastic to go to class. I just did not feel ready and/or excited. The only thing about the dorms that I miss (and that I would have hated if I still lived in the dorms) is all the people who start moving around in the morning and give you this feeling of "Those people are going to class. I wanna go to class too!" It was seriously weird to leave a quiet apartment on a quiet morning. And so was the feeling of being one of very few upper-classmen in an almost all-freshman group at my first class.
However, the quietness of my morning helped me focus on my classes better instead of running around and freaking out about too much assigned work. I did a much better job of just taking the whole thing one step at a time, submitted my first-day assignment, got back to my house, had a snack and went to sleep.
Taking a long nap made me realize that I am in a pretty good shape for working my night shifts again, which made me feel better; and going to walmart got me to see that I am getting much better at organizing my shopping lists than I used to be.
It still feels like it was a very tiring and exhausting day even though it really wasn't. Actually, writing this makes me realize that this day was as much of a bad day as it was a good day. It has been the worst and the best first day of class I ever had. The good side – it was definitely different from any other frist day of class I had before. The bad side – it was surprisingly ordinary – literally a whatever day.
Right now I am torn apart among being excited for the new semester, being happy that it's finally fall and the weather is gonna be cool, looking forward to December to be here already, and wanting this semester to last as long as possible.
Well, I guess, it's not necessarily a bad start!
It feels like one of those november evenings. You wake up and you don't know where you are. It's dark outside and yellowish orange glow of street lights floods your room. You realize you have been sleep deprived so you took a nap in the afternoon, which apparently did not help much because your body decided to take not long enough of a nap and your mind was conveniently for the body bothered by random stuff that started to bother you as soon as your body decided to take a break from the nap. And then there you are – half-awake, half-asleep, trying to figure out what day it is and what the heck you are supposed to do. It's not too late at night yet, so you hear neighbors walking and talking. You look out of the window and expect to see fresh fallen snow – and see none, which makes you remember that it's still summer out. The problem is – November was so long ago that you forgot what you normally did on those gloomy sleep-deprived November evenings.
You turn on Pandora, hoping to wake up. Don't Stop Believing comes up. Interestingly, however depressed you are, you are realizing – you didn't die. There is a house to clean though, and school to get ready for. And maybe life is not that bad after all.
And there is a shopping list to write. Well, back to life I guess.
So it cooled off a bit finally. You go outside and you feel that you can breathe and it's not even the middle of the night. It is even kinda chilly. I'm gonna go get a blanket. There. Now I'm warm.
I'm sitting on my porch and thinking that I should google how to clean stains off of it.
It's really beautiful out. And I spent the whole day inside. Why would I do that? Meh. Good that I got outside eventually.
The sky is pretty. It is not completely dark yet, so i can see purplish-grey coulds floating in the light bluish-pinkish sky. Yesterday I was in one of them. Last night I was trying to fall asleep, and I imagined that my bed is a big cloud floating slowly in the dark night sky. It made me feel happy and free.
I'm listening to Iron and Wine Pandora station and enjoying the slow evening. Beautiful evening. The cool and refreshing wind keeps slowly carrying the clouds and brings campfire smell. Campfires. I don't think I've been to one this summer. I probably grew up. I was working and taking care of my household – and became a boring adult. Well, maybe the start of school will change that. However, if it will – it will only in part – because I did grow up and I don't mind it – I just need to not forget how to be crazy.
However what I am doing now is a completely boring old-people thing – I am sitting on my porch, wrapped in a blanket, listening to music, drinking tea and writing in my journal. Dreaming of campfires and scary stories, lots of blankets, guitars and teary because of the smoke eyes. I do doubt that I will be feeling that adult when school starts. Or maybe I will. It is a new and interesting – but not bad – feeling. I kinda like it.
Now the clouds are lighter than the sky – probably lit my rising moon. And it got even colder. It's not really cold – but in comparison to the hot weather of the summer, now is a jacket weather.
The lawn is lit by orange light which I am not sure what I think about. I like it and I don't. It's warm and orange, which is nice. But it's annoying at the same time.
Hi! That's me again – a little writing raccoon! Or should I say THE little because of how much you all love me? No, I should introduce myself so that my devoted fans and followers would know how to address me. So there, I am Nolem the little writing raccoon. My name is amazing, despite – no, exactly because it is my attempt to read the word watermelon backwards. How smart is this? I look at an empty bottle from lipton diet green tea with watermelon flavor and come up with a name. Nolem The Writing Raccoon. I was too lazy to read the second part. R. E. T. A. W. Alright. I guess I can be Nolem Retaw, The Little Writing Raccoon. I like that. It's beautiful. It has a sound of freedom to it. You can't find it? It doesn't matter. Go eat a watermelon and stop asking stupid questions about my creativity. Anyways, gotta go do my important raccoon business. I have my life, too, outside of that genius writing stuff. How would I write everything if all I did was write? I'll come back soon, with more stuff for you.
So there's my second day of vacation gone by. I have two more weeks of vacation. The funny thing though, I was looking forward to my vacation and every day was thinking about it. And now I'm almost bored. I do understand that I took this time to catch up with sleep, get ready for school and do fun stuff – and those two weeks are gonna go by like a second. I think my problem is that I forgot how to relax and have fun. I work too much, get exhausted, and hate myself – and then, when it's all gone, I feel like it's empty. I don't know how to have fun and what to do.
Ok, so I was gonna make a bracelet. Clean my house, fully unpack, and decorate the walls. Get more furniture. Figure out what else I need for my house. I could read a book. I could take more pictures and learn something new about photography. Yeah, I need to be collecting plants too. And do some office stuff downtown. And and and and. So. I am still not doing anything and bored.
Well I could change that. I should write a goal list for each day and accomplish it – and do whatever in the time that's left. This way, I'll be getting stuff done, and the value of doing whatever will be noticeably higher.
But now I want chocolate. Or a candy bar. Also, I could use a walk. So I should take a walk to get myself a candy bar! But I'm so sleepy… Maybe I should have a cup of tea and go to bed.